Gaslighting can be driven by various motives, and it’s important to note that not everyone engages in this behavior intentionally. Some common motives behind gaslighting include:
Power and control:
Gaslighters seek to exert power and control over others. By manipulating their victims’ perception of reality, they can maintain dominance and influence their behavior and decisions.
Example:
A boss gaslights an employee by constantly questioning their competence, distorting facts, and undermining their achievements to maintain control over their position and workload.
Insecurity and self-esteem:
Gaslighters with low self-esteem may resort to undermining others to elevate their own sense of self-worth. By making their victims doubt themselves, they feel more superior and secure.
Example:
A romantic partner consistently criticizes their significant other’s appearance, intelligence, or abilities, making them doubt their own worth and become more reliant on the gaslighter’s validation.
Emotional manipulation:
Gaslighting can be a manipulative tactic to control someone’s emotions and elicit specific responses. By distorting reality and sowing confusion, gaslighters can make their victims feel guilty, dependent, or even question their own sanity.
Example:
A parent repeatedly denies or belittles their child’s emotions, making them feel guilty for expressing their feelings and manipulating them into conforming to the parent’s expectations.
To avoid falling victim to gaslighting, consider the following strategies:
Trust your instincts:
If something feels off or you sense manipulation, listen to your intuition. Gaslighters often rely on making you doubt yourself, so trusting your gut is crucial.
Maintain healthy boundaries:
Establish clear boundaries in your relationships and assert them when necessary. Gaslighters may try to push your boundaries, so it’s important to recognize and protect them.
Seek support:
Reach out to trusted friends, family, or a therapist to discuss your experiences. They can provide an objective perspective, validate your feelings, and offer support during challenging situations.
Educate yourself:
Learn about gaslighting and manipulation tactics to recognize when they are being used against you. Awareness is key to protecting yourself.
Build self-confidence:
Gaslighters often target individuals with low self-esteem. Working on building your confidence and self-worth can make you more resilient to gaslighting attempts.
Maintain documentation:
Keep records of conversations, incidents, or evidence that can help you validate your experiences if needed. This documentation can be important for your own clarity and confronting gaslighters if necessary.
Remember, if you suspect you are being gaslighted or emotionally manipulated, prioritize your well-being and seek professional help if needed.
GIPHY App Key not set. Please check settings